REVIEW OF 2008: Big Ed And His Small Feet

This post may have put paid to Ed Malcolm’s political ambitions. Apparently he’s desperate to become an MP and is currently trying to sweet talk his way into getting the nomination for the Houghton and Washington East seat which Fraser Kemp will be vacating at the next election.

Big Ed and His Small Feet ..

Whilst troupe members were busy frolicking about earlier today The Monkey noticed that some members of the troupe had bigger feet and penises than others. The Monkey wonders whether the same can be said of humans.

Apparently there is a theory that the size of an individuals feet directly correlates to they size of their penis i.e. small feet, small penis.

The Monkey recalls having a cosy chat with Coun Ed Malcolm recently during which the size of Ed’s feet left a lasting impression on The Monkey – they are so tiny The Monkey reckons he gets his footwear from the childrens section at Clarkes or perhaps even Toys R Us!

As for the other part of the theory, The Monkeyhas been unable to get Coun Olive Punchion to confirm or deny whether Ed’s penis reflects the size of his feet, however, the grin on her face suggests that the theory may be just an old wife’s tale.

Maybe this explains why married women like councillor Olive Punchion have spent year’s playing with ‘Big Ed’s’ dick toes.


3 Responses to “REVIEW OF 2008: Big Ed And His Small Feet”

  1. 1 Billy Hunt
    27/12/2008 at 19:25

    I saw Edwardo at a recent council meeting – does he wear eye liner?

    Surely, he doesnt bat for both sides like his brother?

    Either way, Potts clearly made “eyes” at him when he saw Ed’s eye lashes caked with Boots No 7.

    What a marriage – Potts and Ed – 2 slippery characters with a match made in heaven.

  2. 2 Kinky boots
    27/12/2008 at 23:11

    I noticed ED watching Alison Strikes boots on four occasions and noticed his first love Olive had them on uuuurrgh, perish the thought.
    Does ED like kinky booties?

  3. 3 Mr Monkey
    30/12/2008 at 21:21

    He’ll shag anything as long as it’s old an wringly.
    I reckon the sorry bastard needs to be mothered and I can’t help wondering whether he wears a nappy to live out his fantasies. Mind you if he needs suckling he’ll get fuck all out of Olive’s dried up tits.

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