01
Feb
09

Tyne Twat – The Tale of A Whore

'For Sale - all offers accepted'

'For Sale - all offers accepted'

Ugly Betty started her working life as a pickpocket but quickly turned to prostitution when she realised it was easier to steal a man’s money when his trousers were off than when they were on. Sex was her way of getting closer to a man to pilfer his money, simply a means to an end. She tried her luck at the clubs but was always chucked out for stealing. So she focused on the river, where she had greater access to the seamen and thier goodies.

Once she got into their cabins, she could wreak havoc, stealing whatever she could get her hands on. From their rooms, she would take cigarettes, cash, shoes, watches, clothing – anything she could give away or sell. From the galley, she pilfered meat, cheese, bread, packets of noodles, fruit and alcohol. She preferred the short-stay ships because she could do her business and get away before anyone knew what was taken. By the time they realised they’d been robbed, they would already be out at sea. 

Ugly Betty admitted that, with her attitude, she wasn’t much of a lover. She didn’t give a damn about her clients’ sexual satisfaction; she didn’t even pretend to be interested. Sometimes she’d yawn, look at her watch or even try to take a nap while the man was busy trying to bang her. As he was about to shoot his load, she was only thinking about how she was going to reach down to his pants on the floor and empty his wallet. 

Ugly Betty always took full advantage of opportunities to steal when she was on the ships, but there were lots of other pleasures to enjoy too. Ultimately she didn’t go aboard to steal but to make money through sex and have a party with the sailors. She didn’t want to just get on and off; she wanted to hang out with the men and make herself at home. 

Arthur, a 68 year-old riverside veteran who was always willing to talk in depth to me, said that Ugly Betty used to move from ship to ship for days at a time, sometimes without even bothering to return home. She would live on the boats, party with the seamen at the clubs, then return with them to their cabins where they would sleep together. Usually she tried to pair up with one of the officers who could afford to keep her for days at a time. Sometimes she would even participate in the domestic upkeep of the ship to give the impression she cared, when all the time she was looking for yet more opportunities to rob its crew. 

Such long-term interactions inevitably led to closer relationships and on more than one occasion she fell in love with her client. Once she grew attached to an old Greek captain. He seemed to have felt something for her too, more akin to empathy than lust, and she responded to his selfless concern with total devotion. He promised to send for her to start a new life on a Greek Island but quickly changed his mind when his dick started to swell and he felt a burning sensation every time he went for a piss. 

… more to follow.


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