miss piggy orders a new set of wheels – paid for by you

'Piggy's wheels'

'Piggy's wheels'

Mr Monkey wonders how many people know that South Tyneside council recently did it’s bit to help the ailing British car industry by buying another Swedish car? A fuckwit Iain Malcolm in the town hall decided that it was time to add another black Volvo to the growing collection of council vehicles.

Apparently Iain Malcolm, aka Miss Piggy didn’t want the new deputy mayor, coun Tom Piggott travelling round the borough on his own, because he couldn’t be sure what he’d say. To avoid any embarrassing Piggott moments, coun Malcolm thought the deputy mayor should always be accompanied?

The council already has one black Volvo which comes complete with a chauffeur and it’s used mainly by the mayor, although Iain Malcolm has been known to use it when he needs a lift to the airport. Mr Monkey has now been told coun Iain Malcolm felt that one wasn’t enough so in these difficult economic times – when people are struggling financially – he  decided the time was right to buy a second one. 

He also thought he’d do his bit to help massage the unemployment figures by recruiting another chauffeur – what good is a car without a driver?


8 Responses to “miss piggy orders a new set of wheels – paid for by you”

  1. 1 clock this
    23/05/2009 at 21:06

    also used to ferry a flushed Councillor Milburn home to Cleadon Village, after the Council Annual Meeting! Good eh!

  2. 2 A N Mus
    24/05/2009 at 01:05

    Who Piggott? Why gag him? Thought Borough operated on free speech principle.

  3. 3 TEZZA
    24/05/2009 at 15:04

    Maybe Iain malcolm(miss Piggy)and vodka Lil could use it to tour the wonderful horsley hill estate that they have managed to improve(or so they spout), guess they would feel ever so safe in this wonderful area with all the gardens looking so lovely at this time of year, one would hardly be able to see the abandoned cars over the deep and rich green grass, Sooner this town wakes up the better,get them all out, if you dont vote thinking you can’t change things then your wrong, dont waste your vote pay back labour and there M.P’s and vote them out.! but try not to opt for postal voting, because even if you post the vote yourself it may still get lost or SPOILT.(especially if its not marked Labour).KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK MR MONKEY

  4. 4 A N Mus
    24/05/2009 at 20:36

    Ooh you ate awful!
    After all there hard work too!
    If theres no postal votes, whats miss Piggy going to do in her spare time?
    You know she likes to look at them.

  5. 5 Jonny
    25/05/2009 at 00:26

    The best thing to do here would be to get malcolm in the car and push it over the cliffs at Marsden….

  6. 6 A N Mus
    25/05/2009 at 20:37

    But Jonny, he might be hurt.

  7. 7 TEZZA
    26/05/2009 at 00:00

    What a good idea mate put my name down for that one, In fact I would keep hold of the bastard all the way down, just to watch the look on his face, and hear miss piggy scream.

  8. 8 Fuckwit Dildo
    27/05/2009 at 07:16

    Hi MrM, its a fucking disgrace that we pay for ONE fucking expensive chauffer driven car for these lazy cunts but now a SECOND one has appeared along with another chauffer. Fucking absolutely disgusting waste of public money !
    Keep up the good work Mr M.
    Hows the case going for Mr Tits and his fondling of the council worker ? Has she managed to nail the fucker via the courts ?

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