Archive for the 'Electronic voting' Category

25
Mar
09

their worst nightmare: Mr Monkey returns!

'Hero worship - coun Iain Malcolm is set to join an exclusive club of election fraudsters headed by his political hero Robert Mugabe'

'Hero worship - coun Iain Malcolm is set to join an exclusive club of election fraudsters headed by his political hero Robert Mugabe'

It seems Mr Monkey’s sudden disappearance has resulted in all kinds of speculation as to his whereabouts, with politicians, council officers and bloggers all left wondering what’s happened to this naughty chimp.

Mr Monkey reckons that for the last 7 days the borough’s political elite, senior council officers and Mr Grumpy, aka Papa John Szymanski at the Gazette have been hoping and praying that their nightmare was finally over and that the chimp’s sudden silence finally signalled the end of Mr Monkey’s Blog.

Sorry to disappoint you miserable bastards but nothing could be further from the truth – you’re nightmares are about to get a whole lot worse!

Mr Monkey took some time out to recharge his batteries, follow up a few interesting leads and finalise his investigations into the culture of election fraud in the local Labour party.

It seems that council leader Iain Malcolm has cheated his way to the top and that his unique vision of democracy in action wouldn’t be out of place in Zimbabwe. 

Mr Monkey can now reveal that the results of his month long investigation into election fraud and ballot rigging in South Tyneside will be published tomorrow and he reckons that senior local Labour politicians won’t sleep too well tonight knowing what Mr Monkey is about to publish will expose many of their corrupt and devious practises which have helped keep them power for so long.

If you don’t miss out on these exclusive revelations, keep eye on Mr Monkey Blog over the next day or so.

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02
Mar
09

who pressed the wrong button?

After months of waiting, the electronic voting system in the council chamber was used for the first time at last week’s full council meeting.

Things could’nt have been simpler, all the bloodsuckers councillors had to do was:

  • press the the green button for yes
  • press the the red button for no
  • press the white button to abstain

but Mr Monkey has learned that it was all to much for one fuckwit who seems to have pressed the wrong button and voted with the Tories.

When it was time to vote on the King of Sleaze’s, Tory Boy Potts amendment, 43 voted against the motion and 3 voted for it – yet there were only 2 Tories in the chamber.

This chimp is trying to find out who the fuckwit was and will let bloggers know as soon as he hears anything.