Archive for the 'Thatcher' Category


councillor sectioned following sacking

'Councillor Potts cannot cope with his demons'

'Councillor Potts cannot cope with his demons'

A year ago councillor David Potts was a rising star in the Conservative party after being selected as the Conservative Parliamentary candidate to stand against the Chancellor, Alistair Darling at the next general election.

Many Scottish Conservatives reckoned that he was destined for great things and even councillor David Potts believed that he would – at the very least become a  minister in the new Conservative administration – that was until Mr Monkey revealed his antics here in South Tyneside to the world.

Within months of exposing the ‘real David Potts’ any ambitions he had to make it to Westminster were over. The Scottish Conservatives took the unusual step of effectively sacking him by removing him as their candidate and replacing him with Edinburgh councillor, Jason Rust who ironically had been pictured with David Potts on a number of occasions.

Councillor Potts found it difficult to come to terms with this rejection and his life quickly spiralled downwards.

Publicly he tried to convince the world that he had ‘resigned’ because of his father’s ill health and when it was pointed out to him by people who knew his father that this wasn’ttrue, he changed his story and claimed that the real reason he resigned was so that he could return to South Tyneside to fight the far right threat posed by the BNP.

He attended one meeting hosted by the leader of South Tyneside Council and to date no further meetings have been held.

Those close to councillor Potts feared for his safety and mental wellbeing as his behaviour became more erratic. They noticed that his drink problem had became more profound, he started to talk to imaginary beings and became increasing paranoid – he thought he was being followed by monkeys and started to see chimps everywhere.

This paranoia was coupled with depression, something he had suffered from as a child. He found it difficult to cope with and eventually retreated into his own world, he refused to answer his telephone, speak to anyone and then disappeared.

Some people thought he’d gone on holiday but Mr Monkey can now reveal that he returned to Scotland in an attempt to tackle his Edinburgh demons, but bottled it at the last minute and ended up in Glasgow.

He thought he was safe there where he could hide amongst the down and outs, tramps, alcoholics and drug addicts – that was until a jogger spotted him in the infamous Glasgow Green on the banks of the Clyde and called the police.

Apparently when the police arrived they found him unconscious on a park bench dressed in khaki shorts, a beige tshirt and a pith helmet. He was surrounded by a dozen toy monkeys, some of which had been mutilated and a fluffy chimp hanging from the tree above him in what appeared to have been a mock execution.

When the police roused him he refused to acknowledge their presence, pulled out a water pistol and started to ‘shoot’ the toy monkeys. He even tried to kiss and cuddle 2 blue monkeys which he kept referring to us Maggie and Smeagol.

At this point the police decided to ‘protect’ him and took him to the Gartnavel Royal Hospital where he was detained under section 4 of the Mental Health Act.

Mr Monkey can reveal that councillor Potts – who has a history of mental illness – is now hoping he can use his own experiences to change people’s perception of menal health and is campaigning for the law to be changed.



REVIEW of 2008: Potts Cums Clean .. on Teachers

Mr Monkey has decided to dedicate the last few days of 2008 to some of the most popular posts of the year. All the archive material published between now and the end of the year has appeared on either Mr Monkey’s Blog or it’s predecessor The Monkeyhouse.

What better way to start this review of 2008 than with the borough’s very own King of Sleaze, Tory Boy councillor David Potts. His lack of morals, double dealing, lying and cheating, sleazy behaviour and his unflinching support for the local Labour party were exposed by Mr Monkey and eventually led to his downfall and de-selection as Parliamentary candidate for Edinburgh South West.

Potts Cums Clean .. on Teachers

Tory leader David Cameron is often ribbed by Gordon Brown for his lack of policies. Luckily for him, local Tory boy Potts has plenty of them, which he’s willing to put into practise at any opportunity.

Today’s policy is education

While last year he demanded the most vulnerable children in society be moved into boarding schools “because it’s cheaper”, now he’s pro-state school..well, pro-state school teachers anyway…

The pudgy-faced Tory boy, who has already had a primary school teacher girlfriend, has now taken to knocking-off a local comprehensive school teacher when he’s not commuting between Edinburgh and here.

A close friend of the (presumably traumatised) young lady contacted an associate of The Monkeyto say that he’d had his wicked way with the teacher upstairs in the Cottage Tavern pub in Cleadon. Trebles all round!

Who’d have thought it, the leader of the Tories on South Tyneside Council caught-up in a cottage-ing tryst.


It’s A Potty World – Part Two

Mr Monkey’s revelations about Tory Boy Potts, who many believe have been responsible for putting an end to The King of Sleaze’s political career have attracted a considerable amount of attention judging by the stats.

It’s A Potty World – Part One post attracted a record number of hits and the links to Mr Monkey’s older posts are proving to be very popular. 

Mr Monkey has now complied another list of older posts for readers to enjoy. Just click on any of the links below.



It’s A Potty World – Part One!

Mr Monkey can reveal that Pudgy Face Potts, the Tory liar and King of Sleaze has been drowning his sorrows in buckets of gin and has kept a low profile by refusing to answer his phone. According to tonight’s Gazette he will only be making comments via his solicitor.

Mr Monkey reckons Potts is full of shit and that the only solicitor he knows are the pissed up types that are as much use as wannabe MP without a seat to call his own!

A source close to a Potts has now confirmed that Potts is on the verge of losing it and reckons he has told so many lies over the past few months that he can no longer distinguish fact from fiction.

Mr Monkey has lead the campaign to expose the real Potts and thought that he would share some of the older posts that have helped put an end to this prick’s political ambitions!

Click on the links below for an insight in to what Potts has really been getting up to.


Tory Boy Potts Gets The Boot

The King of Sleaze - did he fall or was he thumped by an irrate husband?

The King of Sleaze - did he fall or was he thumped by an irrate husband?

Less than a year after Tory Boy Potts opposed a motion of no confidence in the then Labour Leader of South Tyneside Council, Paul Waggott, the King of Sleaze has found himself at the centre of another motion of no confidence. 

This time his fellow Tories have turned the tables on Pudgy Face by unanimously approving a motion of no confidence in closet socialist, David Potts.
Tory Boy was due to take on Chancellor Alistair Darling at the next general election is now on the verge of being deselected by the local party. Conservative activists in Edinburgh South-West have written to Scottish Conservative headquarters asking for him to be removed as their candidate.

Mr Darling had a majority of 7242 at the last election, but with Labour’s opinion poll rating collapsing, local Tories believe their chances of taking the seat have improved and complained Mr Potts was not spending enough time in the constituency to mount an effective campaign.

Inez Paisley, chairwoman of the Edinburgh South-West Conservative Association, declined to comment on the deselection move. But one association member said Mr Potts had not been up to Edinburgh as often as he should have been and there had been “virtually no campaigning at all”.

The member said: 

“He never attends any functions or meetings of the executive. The executive of the association unanimously decided to send a letter to Central Office, asking for him to be removed as candidate as they had no confidence in him any more. They are just waiting to hear back if they can go ahead with it. He seems to be in denial that this is happening. He doesn’t seem to accept it, but he will go.”

Potts claims to have been a Tory activist since he was 14, was elected as a councillor in 2004. He is currently the self appointed leader of Tory group which is made up of just 3 councillors including Potts.

He was selected to fight Edinburgh South-West last year, but his name has now been removed from the association’s website.

Mr Potts claimed he was “entirely unaware” of any move to deselect him. “I don’t know what you are talking about,” he said. “As far as I’m concerned, I have a very healthy relationship with them” – bullshit! 

But then most people in South Tyneside know what an unreliable, self opinionated, arrogant lying hypocrite he is and Mr Monkey is delighted that the Scottish Tories have found out just in time.
Mr Monkey reckons that his unflinching support for the Labour party in return for financial gain, his womanising ways, alcohol problem (he loves knocking back triple gins for breakfast, usually in the Red Lion) and his fabricated background, all of which have been exposed on Mr Monkey’s Blog, have put an end to any political ambitions he had.
All that remains, is for Tory Councillors Wood and Milburn to deselect their ‘leader’ and for the people of Cleadon and East Boldon to oust this scum bag before he brings shame on this quiet corner of South Tyneside.

Would You Like To Shit on Maggie?

All that bullshit about whether or not Thacher should be ‘honoured’ by a state funeral when she eventually pops her clogs has got Mr Monkey thinking about where her final resting place might be .. other than hell of course!

Mr Monkey reckons that the old cow could do worse than being buried at the bottom of a coal shaft although rumour has it that she’s now thinking about being cremated. Consett has been mentioned, although their aren’t any furnaces anymore (she saw to that) they reckon the locals have already made plans for the mother of all bonfires. There’s even talk of thousands of street parties up and down the country to celebrate her death.

If all else fails I suppose she could be buried under a toilet, at least that way we can all get to shit on her .. think of it as returning the favour after all she spawned NuLabour and gave us Tory Boy Potts!

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