Archive for the 'Violence' Category


Amateur Snappers Left Disappointed

Protest ... an anti-war campaigner.It seems on or two of the borough’s amateur snappers were left disappointed last night when nothing more sinister than a few sarcastic comments were hurled in the direction of the Labour party’s war-mongers who were attending a fund raising dinner at South Tyneside College.

 The £15 a head bash was to raise funds for the local Labour party and was attended by South Shields MP and Foot in Mouth Foreign Secretary David Miliband and fellow cabinet member John Hutton, the Defence Secretary.

Guests were met by an orderly but boisterous crowd of around 70 Anti War protesters who had gathered to protest about the recent conflict in Gaza.

Despite fevered speculation in certain quarters that the whole thing was being orchestrated by Indy councillor Ahmed Khan, it must have come as a disappointment to some to find that there was no sign him.

Apparently certain individuals were convinced that they were on to an ‘excluisve’ and that they would capture councillor Khan on camera leading hordes of Muslim protesters –  including children – up Dean Road to the college, no doubt damaging property, vehicles and hurling anti semitic abuse as they went.

Imagine these poor bastards disappointment when the only councillors that crossed their lenses were Labour and that the vast majority of the well behaved crowd were white, many of whom according to reports looked  “affluent”.

To add insult to injury there was hardly a Muslim in sight, let alone a child. Mr Monkey reckons councillor Khan may have had the last laugh as he watched from afar.


REVEIW OF 2008: Is Gazette Coverage Linked To Money?

Like many people Mr Monkey has always thought the amount of coverage given to local villain Noddy Rice and his family was over the top. Back in August this post speculated as to the real reason for Papa John Szymanski’s (editor of the local snooze-paper and chair of the Malcolm Fan Club) obsession with all things ‘Noddy’.

Is Gazette Coverage Linked To Money?

Mr Monkey normally doesn’t bother buying a copy of the Gazette but tonight will be different!

Mr Monkey wants to check out the Family Notices pages to see how much money has been spent on death notices for Ryan Burns, aka ‘Noddy’ Rice’s son. He reckons that this may explain why the Gazette’s coverage of the Noddy Rice clan is always over the top.

Who knows, the Gazette might even break with recent tradition and actually include something worth reading!


Monkey Puzzle 5 Revealed

The answer to Monkey Puzzle 5 is;

Councillor John Mcabe who apparently loves a bottle or two of Stella Artois.

According to Wikipedia Stella Artois “was given the nickname wife beater due to it’s percived connection with aggression”.

Mr Monkey reckons that’s why councillor Mcabe was chosen as Iain Malcolm’s enforcer the Labour party’s chief whip!


It’s A Potty World – Part Two

Mr Monkey’s revelations about Tory Boy Potts, who many believe have been responsible for putting an end to The King of Sleaze’s political career have attracted a considerable amount of attention judging by the stats.

It’s A Potty World – Part One post attracted a record number of hits and the links to Mr Monkey’s older posts are proving to be very popular. 

Mr Monkey has now complied another list of older posts for readers to enjoy. Just click on any of the links below.



Sorry Folks

Apologies for not posting yesterday but Mr Monkey decided to follow Tory Boy Potts up to Scotland to see what dirt he could find the locals thought about The King of Sleaze.

Mr Monkey arrived back late last night and was too knackered to post.

The trip itself proved very rewarding but more of that later!


Monkey Clip

This week’s Monkey Clip is dedicated to all those wannabee politicians who crave attention on the world stage and will do anything to get it, even if it means bending over with a tub of Vaseline up their arse will someone gives them what for!

They’re not beyond selling their principles to the highest bidder, lying, cheating, treating the electorate with contempt, shitting on their colleagues, sleeping with the enemy (or anything else with a hole) and even pretending they care – yes they really do believe their own bullshit!

Mr Monkey reckons Councillors Iain Malcolm and I’ll shag anything, David Potts fit the bill perfectly.

CLICK HERE to see what they really get up to. 

If you’ve enjoyed this week’s Monkey Clip click here, here and here to view some of Mr Monkey’s previous Monkey Clips.


EXCLUSIVE: Man Assaulted in Jarrow

EXCLUSIVE: A 25 year old man was assaulted on Friday evening outside a Jarrow pub.

The incident took place around 10.30pm outside the Golden Lion public house in Walter Street, Jarrow after the man became involved in an altercation.

The victim is aged 25 years old, is 6’5″, of heavy build, black hair and also has facial hair.

He is currently detained in the Intensive Care Unit at South Tyneside District Hospital where he is receiving treatment for head injuries. His condition is said to be serious but not life threatening.

Anyone that may have witnessed the assault or has any information is asked to contact police on 03456 043043.

Posted 8.05am on18/8/08