mr united set to challenge labour

Any day now Steady Eddie, aka councillor McAtominey the disgraced Labour councillor and convicted felon will learn whether or not he’s to be booted out of the Labour party.

Councillor McAtominey, who was suspended from the Labour party last year after being arrested on suspicion of drink driving and was later convicted of failing to provide a sample has had his case referred to the National Executive of the Labour party after Labour North shirked their responsibilities and failed to terminate his membership.

Steady Eddie made things worse for himself when he was arrested for a second time and charged with drink driving. This time he pleaded guilty and was banned from driving.

Councillor McAtominey is no stranger to controversy – he was suspended from the Labour party for 4 years after he was caught cheating on printing tenders with the help of his now wife councillor Nancy Maxwell, who was a union employee and his accomplice.

Mr Monkey has been told by an insider that councillor McAtominey has decided that if he’s thrown out of the Labour party he will not stand down as a councillor but instead he will cross the floor and become an Independent, so will his wife councillor Maxwell.

Apparently they’ve already discussed this with their friend and Labour party thug enforcer, councillor John McCabe and councillor McAtominey is telling those close to him that councillor McCabe is  likely to follow him and rejoin the ranks of the Independents after first being elected as an Independent and then crossing the floor to Labour.

Steady Eddie is predicting that he’s the man to unite the opposition groups and that he will lead the challenge on Labour. He’s determined to go down in history as the man that killed off the Malcolms.

Good luck Mr United – this chimp is looking forward to seeing you in action once again, but this time with the support of some ferocious allies instead of the fuckwits you currently share the benches with.

Labour councillors paid almost half a million pounds

Its Labour’s turn to face Mr Monkey’s how much do they cost the taxpayer test.

When bloggers look at the figures it’s easy to see why so many Labour stalwarts have been around for so long. No wonder they squeal like pigs on the way to the slaughter house when they face the prospect of being dragged away from the trough.

Mr Monkey also reckons that this is why their lives are decimated when the electorate kick them out and why so many of them try and grab someone else’s seat on the council. This is the only way they can get their snouts back in the trough – there’s never been any honour amongst thieves especially when it comes to money.

Here are some of the highlights from The Labour Greed List,

• Coun Iain Malcolm made the highest claim at £32,435 (£623.75 a week)

• Coun Alan Kerr claimed at £23,319 (£448.44 a week)

• Coun Ernest Gibson claimed a record £4,932.27 for travel and subsistence

• Coun Rob Dix treated himself to a new BMW when he was elected. This delivery driver receives an annual boost to his salary from the taxpayer of around £14,000.

• After replacing Paul Waggott as leader of the council, Coun Malcolm promptly put the boot in by not giving Coun Linda Waggott a place at his trough. She was the only Labour councillor not to receive a special responsibility allowance.

Mr Monkey was staggered to learn that almost half a million pounds of taxpayers money was paid to just 31 Labour councillors and for what? Most of them can’t string a sentence together and couldn’t care less about the people they represent, that is until it’s time for their re-election.

The cost of each Labour councillor to the taxpayer in 2008 – 09 was a staggering £15,029.83.

Name	Allowance	Travel	Subsistence	Total	Weekly Cost
Anglin, J	11,760	–	–	11,760	226.15
Bell, J	16,464	–	–	16,464	316.61
Boyack, P	13,833	691.25	152.33	14,676	282.23
Brady, W  E	16,464	–	–	16,464	316.61
Clare, M H	16,464	–	–	16,464	316.61
Dix, R	14,112	–	–	14,112	271.38
Dixon, T	15,352	1,566.80	315.62	17,234	331.43
Donaldson, A	8,168	–	129.63	8,297	159.55
Foreman, J	16,464	800.15	214.01	17,478	336.11
Gibson, E	16,186	3,431.90	1,500.37	21,118	406.12
Hanson, T	16,464	–	–	16,464	316.61
Kerr, A	22,408	733.47	177.63	23,319	448.44
Leask, E	14,112	–	–	14,112	271.38
Lewell, E L	11,760	–	–	11,760	226.15
Malcolm, E	16,464	1,253.10	605.91	18,323	352.36
Malcolm, I	31,817	239.00	379.82	32,435	623.75
Maxwell, N E	16,464	228.50	72.94	16,765	322.40
McAtominey, E	12,962	638.40	53.12	13,653	262.56
McCabe, J G	14,112	–	–	14,112	271.38
McMillan, A	11,481	–	–	11,481	220.78
Meeks, J	14,112	334.60	160.61	14,607	280.90
Perry, J	16,464	–	–	16,464	316.61
Piggot, T	11,760	–	–	11,760	226.15
Punchion, O	11,760	102.40	–	11,862	228.11
Scorer, B	14,112	211.20	111.75	14,434	277.57
Sewell, J	16,464	658.75	734.78	17,857	343.40
Spraggon, S	11,203	151.20	–	11,354	218.34
Stewart, A M	13,833	114.90	88.47	14,036	269.92
Strike, A	11,760	56.00	–	11,816	227.23
Waggott, L I	7,056	–	–	7,056	135.69
Walsh, A	8,486	372.00	15.42	8,873	170.63
TOTALS:	450,321*	10,892.37	4,712.41	465,925*	8,973.16

*These figures do not include pence

McCabe’s rose tinted glasses

'A common sight under Labour in South Tyneside'

A sleazy picture of drunken yobs on Lukes Lane Estate in Hebburn has been used across the world to highlight the breakdown of British society under Labour.

The picture showing 2 youths in hoodies, swigging from a bottle has angered councillor John McCabe, aka ‘The Enforcer’ and his fellow Hebburn councillors who say the photograph does not properly represent the Lukes Lane Estate nor South Tyneside as a whole.

Councillor McCabe – the alleged wife beater said, “I think these pictures will anger all those town councillors who are working to improve places like the Lukes Lane Estate, where we have invested a lot of time and money”.

Mr Monkey wonders how often these so called representatives of the people visit some of the estates they represent because statements like this just show how out of touch they are.

Mr Monkey reckons it’s about time these councillors got off their lazy arses and saw for themselves the anti social behaviour that decent folk have to put up with on a daily basis before making fuckwit comments like this.

This chimp would like to remind The Enforcer that after more than a decade of Labour’s failed policies, hundreds of millions of pounds of public money, endless legislation and regulation the problem is worse than it’s ever been – and you’ve only got yourselves to blame.

So stop whining and do something about it, kissing your paymaster’s arse and burying your head in the sand won’t solve the problem.

Shame On You – You’re A Disgrace

Today is Holocaust Memorial Day.

Yes January 27th is the day when people throughout the world remember the victims of the Nazi Holocaust and of more recent genocides in Cambodia, Darfur, Bosnia, Rwanda, Iraq and Palestine.

Numerous ceremonies to remember the victims of these atrocities have taken place up and down the country including here in South Tyneside where each year the Mayor hosts a ceremony on behalf of the people of the borough to make the occasion.

Apparently today’s guests included a select band of children, members of the public, church goers, a few council officers, a handful of councillors and the usual band of Labour party activists – Mr Monkey is still waiting for details of these scrounging bastards but can confirm that Pat Morris and Jack Brown were seen loitering around the buffet table.

The ceremony itself apparently included several readings, recitals, a prayer, and a few words (via letters) from our local MP’s. There was also a flower laying and candle lighting ceremony.

Mr Monkey can confirm that although today’s ceremony was well attended it seems most councillors, executive directors of the council and business leaders couldn’t be bothered to turn up.

According to a source inside the town hall only 11 councillors out of a possible 54 had the decency to make an appearance, these included: councillors Alex Donaldson, John Anglin, Peter Boyack, Jim Foreman, Ahmed Khan, Jane Branley, Joan Meeks, Tom Piggot, Jimmy Sewell, Ernest Gibson and Alan Kerr.

Notable absences included the Chuckle Brothers, aka Ian and Ed Malcolm, Michael Clare, Bill Brady (Lead Member for Equality and Diversity), Tracy Dixon, Joanne Bell, Audrey McMillan, Linda Waggott, Barry Scorer, John McCabe, Jim Perry and Tom Hanson.

The King of Sleaze Tory Boy David Potts and his two stooges Wood and Millburn, all three Liberal Democrats, the two representatives of the We’ve Finally Made Our Mind Up Party Real Independents councillors Lurch and Red Rum Haram and Elsom plus their new lackey Tom Defty were all conspicuous by their absence.

Apparently the Progressives didn’t bother turning up because they still think its 1986.

Mr Monkey reckons that each and every one of you lazy bastards who couldn’t be bothered to turn up should hang your heads in shame – in the words of the King of Sleaze .. “you’re a disgrace”.

McCabe Gets A Grandad Makeover

'Everyones favourite Grandad, councillor John McCabe'

Labour’s obsession with spin and image seems to have finally reached Hebburn.

If the latest pictures of councillor McCabe in his Val Doonican look-alike jumpers and grandad cardigans are anything to go by, councillor McCabe seems to have had a Labour makeover and is now being portrayed as everyone’s favourite grandad figure – he’s even been given the grey look.

Councillor McCabe has always had a reputation for having a bit of a short fuse and reckons he’s a bit of a hard man; some of his Labour colleagues call him phsyco. This may also explain the allegations of domestic violence and why his wife has now divorced him.

Mr Monkey has learned that councillor Iain Malcolm is scared shit-less of councillor McCabe and feels the only way to control him is to keep him on his side. But he’s also worried that the the image of one of his lackeys in a Stella stained string vest will not go down well with voters and has decided it’s time to soften his image with a grandad makeover.

What next, councillor Spraggon to get a personality?

Eddie Makes An Ass Out of The Law

Hebburn’s number one piss headand convicted drunk driver councillor Eddie McAtominey seems to have played a blinder yesterday by making an ass out of the law.

Steady ‘hic’ Eddie who was convicted of drink driving earlier this month and who was eventually forced resigned from his highly lucrative paid positions on the council and the Police Authority faced another charge of failing to provide a specimen following his arrest on suspicion of drink driving back in April.

Since then councillor McAtominey has consistently protested his innocence and has made a number of appearances before Magistrates in South Shields and Peterlee where he’s pleaded not guilty.

Unfortunately the lying bastard was caught red handed at the wheel of his car earlier this month after buying a bottle of vodka and drinking it before throwing the empty bottle over a wall and getting into his car to drive home. This time he was fucked and decided he’d better plead guilty.

He appeared before South Shields Magistrates the following day and was banned from driving for 22 months.

The same week his representative Terence Carney appeared before Peterlee Magistrates to continue the not guilty charade and a pre-trial date was set for 28th November.

Yesterday the piss head changed his mind and after months of prevaricating, lying, cheating and wasting thousands of pounds of taxpayers money and hundreds of hours of court time the scheming bastard pleaded guilty in the hope he would get off lightly.

Mr Monkey can’t believe that the stupid fucking Magistrates actually fell for his con, unless of course they took pity on the cancer pickled liver conman. Or did they now him? Seems justice was not done on this occasion and the sentence slap on the wrist certainly didn’t fit the crime.

A twelve month ban and a couple of hundred quid fine no way reflects the seriousness of his crime. The drunken bastard could have killed and injured innocent people; including children.

Seems the Magistrates at Peterlee may have forgotten why they volunteered for the bench in the first place – either that or it’s time they made way for people with balls.

Mr Monkey can’t wait to see what Labour North will make of all this, but they’re not exactly renowned for their balls unless they’re playing with each others!

I Told You So!

Mr Monkey predicted that today’s Full Council meeting would be a lively affair – this is what he had to say;

“Councillor Malcolm has been shitting himself for days at the prospect of councillors Jane and Allan Branley, White, Hodgson and Khan in attack mode. Mr Monkey reckons that today’s gathering will be a rowdy affair”.

 CLICK HERE to see the full post.

It seems Mr Monkey was right as the meeting erupted on several occasions with angry words being exchanged between the Indy Alliance and Labour councillors which led to an angry stand off.

Independent Councillor Allen Branley repeatedly demanded a full public explanation for Steady ‘hic’ Eddie’s McAtominey’s resignation from the council’s cabinet and sought clarification on whether he had also stood down from the Police Authority.

The Hebburn South councillor, was recently convicted of drink driving, and stepped down from his cabinet post at Monday’s monthly meeting of the Labour group.

During a tribute pathectic speech by self appointed Labour ‘Enforcer’, alleged wife beater and fellow Hebburn South, councillor John McCabe said councillor Atominey was ‘here in spirit’.

This brought roars of laughter from the opposition benches and councillor Branley immediately sprung to his feet, saying: “In spirit?”

After a barrage of catcalls from the Labour benches, he added: “Hey, I didn’t bring up his drink driving charge,” triggering more chaos.

Mayor Alex Donaldson struggled to cope with proceedings and had several confrontations with opposition councillors, even threatening at one point: “I’ll adjourn this meeting if this continues and we’ll be here all night.”

Make sure you get a front seat at next month’s meeting – it promises to be a lively affair.

Must Try Harder When It Comes To Attendances

Seems another local blogger has stolen a march on the Gazette Malcolm Fanzine when it comes to councillors attendance records.

A year ago the Northern Herald CLICK HERE ran a Private Eye style report on the attendance record of councillors for the previous 12 months and it makes interesting reading.

The Northern Herald report covered all committees attendances over a 12 month period and provides bloggers with an accurate picture of attendance levels. This appraoch accuratley reflects the commitment shown by each councillor to attending meetings on a week by week basis and not just a select few that they are ‘forced’ to attend because the leader (Miss Piggy) and party whips said so.

It seems that when you do the maths over 12 months a very different picture emerges to the one that is portrayed in Birdman Maclean’s e-mail, CLICK HERE.

LICENSING COMMITTEE. LESSONS UP TO 19 OCTOBER 2007
No register taken before 18 October 2007. However, on the 19th the following members were absent without sick notes; Atkinson, Dix, Gibson, Hanson, Hickman, Lewell, McMillan, Perry, Punchion, Strike and Thompson. Present were Lewis, Meeks and Potts (?) On the 18th the school didn’t have enough members present to form a team., so they had to come back the day after.

HUMAN RESOURCES. LESSONS UP TO 24 OCTOBER 2007
Robinson, Punchion, McMillan, Hetherington and Boyack all receive a gold star for full attendance ( 4 att out of 4). Silver stars to Foreman (3 att out of 4) and Atkinson (2 att out of 4). A bronze award to McAtominey and Branley (1 att out 0f 4) while Bell. J. is suspended for not bothering to come to school ( 0 att out of 4).

CABINET. LESSONS UP TO 17 OCTOBER 2007
Full marks to Sewell and Woods for never missing the school bus (12 att out of 12). What was the matter boys, frightened in case the other boys talked about you? Well done Henderson (11 att out of 12); get to the bus stop earlier and you could be like the rest. The other members in the class managed the following; McAtominey and Waggot (Head Boy) managed to get to school 10 out of 12 times, followed closely by Foreman and Brady with 9 attout of 12. Malcolm in the Middle with 8 out of 12, watch those pizzas’s boy! Last again Bell, with 7 out of 12 attendances. Much more of this and it’s the heads office for you girl!

APPEALS COMMITTEE. LESSONS UP TO 5 OCTOBER 2007
Nolan, Potts, Boyack, Brady, McAtominey and Wood will receive lines and the cane for failing to turn up on 6 out of 6 occasions. Potts, the schools particularly disappointed with you as you should know better, you were warned last year. Litter duty goes to McKie and Meeks (1 att out of 6) with Hanson (2 att out of six) holding the black bin liner. Gibson (4 att out of 6) Hickman and Lewis (5 att out of 6) extra custard.

NEIGHBOURHOOD SERVICES SCRUTINY COMMITTEE. LESSONS UP TO 23 OCTOBER 2007
Top of the class awards to Hetherington, Maxwell, Meeks and Nolan (5 att out of 5), followed by Waddle, Anglin, Lewis and Scorer (4 att out 5). Atkinson and Perry (3 att out of 5) and Boyack (2 attout of 5) stop hanging around the playground with Haram and Strike, their bad influences on you (1 att out of 5).

GENERAL PURPOSE COMMITTEE. LESSONS UP TO 27 SEPTEMBER 2007
I have had to ask the school governors what these lessons actually involve. Elsom, McAtominey, McKie and Milburn (0 att out 2) its pointless asking you what went on. Defty, Hetherington and waddle (1 att out of 2) consider new lessons and Brady, Bell, Clare, Foreman, Hanson, Malcolm, Sewell and Waggot (2 att out of 2) for Gods sake get yourselves a hobby!

CHILDREN AND YOUNG PEOPLE SCRUTINY COMMITTEE. LESSONS UP TO 17 JULY 2007
Branley, Dixon, Kidd and McMillan – act your age(0 att out of 2). McKie, Punchion and Stewart, behave (1 att out of 2). Donaldson, Kerr, McCabe, Robinson and Wood (Scottish lad) well done (2 att out of 2).

AUDIT COMMITTEE. LESSONS UP TO 26 JUNE 2007
Anglin, Pigott, Wood. J. and Davidson, extra privileges (2 att out of 2). Branley, shoe shining duty (0 att out of 2).

OVERVIEW AND SCRUTINY AND CALL IN COMMITTEE. LESSONS UP TO 9 OCTOBER 2007
Abbott, Capstick (4 att out of 4) Defty, Meeks, Maxwell and Perry (3 att out 4) – the schools very proud of you. Donaldson and McCabe (2 att out 4) Dix, Elsom and Potts – why bother (1 att out 4). Malcolm. E. and Scorer, you’re a disruptive influence on the rest of the class (0 att out 4).

REGULATORY AND RESOURCES SCRUTINY COMMITTEE. LESSONS UP TO 11 SEPTEMBER 2007
Pigott, Malcolm, Nolan and Dix (3 att out of 3) extra milk. Anglin, Leask, Robinson and Wood. D., semi skimmed (2 att out of 3). Branley, Lewis and Spraggon (1 att out of 3) and Gibson (0 att out of 3) red top for you watery eyed fops!

FULL COUNCIL. LESSONS UP TO 25 OCTOBER 2007
And finally – the big boy and girls school. With severe over crowding in this class, if your names are not mentioned, it’s the school badge for you. Well done! However, toilet duty to the following; Branley, McMillan and Haram (2 att out of 5). Defty, Harrison, Lewell, Maxwell and Potts, library duty all week (3 att out of 5).

Monkey Puzzle 5 Revealed

The answer to Monkey Puzzle 5 is;

Councillor John Mcabe who apparently loves a bottle or two of Stella Artois.

According to Wikipedia Stella Artois “was given the nickname wife beater due to it’s percived connection with aggression”.

Mr Monkey reckons that’s why councillor Mcabe was chosen as Iain Malcolm’s enforcer the Labour party’s chief whip!

Monkey Clip

After yesterday’s piece in the Gazette CLICK HEREwhich featured Hebburn South councillor, John McCabe, Gordon Brown and Jarrow MP, Stephen Hepburn, Mr Monkey thought he would dedicate this week’s Monkey Clip to our two local celebrities. The only problem is one of them might like it a bit too much!

CLICK HERE here and enjoy.

If you missed last week’s Monkey Clip dedicated to Iain Malcolm and his female accessory Julie – he doesn’t shag the opposite sex, CLICK HERE.